The Breath You Resist: What Your Avoidance of Breathwork Can Teach You

“If you ever need a safe place, come back to the breath.”

We’ve heard it before, in group and private yoga lessons, breathing is comforting. Steady. Available anytime, anywhere to help settle both body and mind. And yet the reality is that breathwork doesn’t feel good to everyone.

Sometimes it can feel unnatural, irritating, or subtly claustrophobic. You might doodle or scroll through your phone. Tune out. Give up with a sigh. What if the opposite were true?

Instead of resisting the breath when it feels unpleasant, what would happen if you leaned in? Not with judgment, but with curiosity? The breath you resist can become your greatest teacher.

Why you resist the breath

Resistance can show up when things get quiet. When your thoughts slow down. When you’re asked to sit with (literally) yourself, with less distraction.

Our everyday lives tend to be fast. Busy. There’s often little room to tune in with how we’re truly feeling between the busyness of life and all of our outside stimulation.

Breathwork brings us back into our bodies. It asks us to slow down. To pay attention to something as simple (and beautifully complex) as the movement of breath in our bodies. With that shift can come tension.

If you’ve ever felt restless or irritated during breathwork, it could be your body’s way of sensing patterns that are begging for exploration. I resist this breath, therefore something about me needs to change.

Control

When we’re told to breathe in a certain way for a certain amount of time, it’s natural to want to get it “right.” Take box breathing. 4-7-8 breathing. Ujjayi. There are tons of different structured breathing techniques out there.

For some of us, the instructions can feel confining. We may place expectations on ourselves to execute “perfect” breaths, even while meditating. But the more we try to control the breath, the more it can elude us.

Sometimes resistance can be an opportunity to surrender the illusion of control. To loosen our grip, and remember that you don’t have to “do” breathwork perfectly for it to be effective.

Vulnerability

The breath is intricately linked to the nervous system and our emotional world. When we meditate or bring awareness to the breath, we may begin to feel emotions that have been lurking just below the surface. Restlessness. Sadness. Stress.

Whenever we sit with stillness—or with anything that has the potential to evoke emotion —there’s a chance something may bubble up. And breathing isn’t an exception.

Your resistance might be showing you that you’re afraid of what you’ll find if you sit with yourself in silence. Instead of viewing this awareness as a problem, it can be useful to recognise it as a form of self-protection. Your body is smart; it’s just pacing what it wants to share with you.

Physical tension

Maybe you tend to take shallow breaths. Or perhaps you feel “tight” in your chest when you lie down, making it difficult to take a deep breath.

Our breath reflects the patterns we hold in our bodies. Holding tension in our shoulders, neck, jaw, or tummy can all contribute to how your body experiences breathwork. There is nothing wrong with your body if it resists certain breathing practices. But your body may be telling you that you need to ease up.

Gently!

So how can you work with this tension, without doubling down and creating more? By cultivating curiosity. Instead of pushing through or quitting, sit with your resistance. What does it feel like in your body? Stay with it. Breathe into it.

Is it boredom? Frustration? Impatience? Try labeling whatever shows up for you.

Does the technique you’re using ask you to take deep, slow breaths? Take a step back. Return to your natural rhythm. Allow the breath to be as it is. Don’t try to change it. Just notice it.

You can even expand your awareness by feeling the points where your body contacts the ground, or tuning into the subtle rising and falling of your belly. If all else fails, give yourself permission to pause. Remember: breathwork isn’t a race.

Honouring your patterns

Over time, you may begin to recognise that the ways in which you resist breathwork are reflections of patterns off the mat.

Do you like to be in control? You may struggle with letting go during meditation.

Does stillness make you uncomfortable? You might find yourself restless when things get quiet.

Perhaps you tend to disconnect from your body unless there’s outside stimulation. Sitting with yourself in meditation creates the opposite environment. Instead of seeing resistance as a bad thing, reframe it as an opportunity to become more self-aware.

That’s the beauty of breathwork.

Not everyone’s yoga practice needs to include meditation or sitting with themselves in silence. But if we’re willing to meet ourselves with openness and without judgment, breathwork can be a gateway to deeper self-understanding.

You might be surprised what you discover with Emily at Mount Martha Yoga. She runs corporate yoga on Mornington Peninsula and also special event yoga around Mornington Peninsula. Contact the studio for details on how she can help you with real breathing and much more.